Monday, August 26, 2013

Wanted: A Guatemalan...


I'm heading back to work in 4 weeks so Chris and I are searching for a nanny for our boys.

We are looking for someone not too old, not too young, not too fat, not too thin, not too pretty (well, that's my requirement anyway), who doesn't demand lots of money to stay with us.  The only reason Chris and I have stayed in a committed marriage for as long as we have is because dating sucks.  Now here we are, holding large glasses of therapeutic wine, staring at a computer screen, searching hundreds of women's profiles hoping to find someone to love us and our kids.  This is so much worse than dating.

I think it would be easier to find a sister wife than a good nanny.  Unfortunately Chris says his hands are full dealing with me and can't imagine 'adding more estrogen' to the household.  Thanks?

Whenever I find the seemingly perfect woman, she's snatched up by another family or is too far out of my price range for consideration.  This has resulted in lots and lots of crying.

Lots.

Which may be the reason behind the estrogen comment.

We know a family who found a wonderful Guatemalan whose legal status is a little fuzzy. For 1200 a month, she takes care of the kids, does light housekeeping, and has dinner started by the time they get home.  I've changed my stance on illegal immigration.

Fortunately my sister is considering stepping in to save the day.  She hasn't fully committed yet but I think that's mostly because I've been a little vague on the whole 'compensation' issue.  Turns out, aunties won't work for hugs.  Especially not hugs from my 2 year old who enjoys using his own excrement as finger paint.

Excuse me.  I need more therapeutic wine...and possibly a Guatemalan.

1 comment:

TheFitnessFreak said...

I probably cook better than the Guatemalan anyway...