Wednesday, May 14, 2008


Colegate sent me this survey via e-mail. Here are my responses...

( ) Gone on a blind date
(X) Skipped school – A class or two in college
( ) Watched someone die – Eww. Morbid. No thanks.
( ) Been to Canada
(X) Been to Mexico – Only by force
( ) Been to Florida
(X) Been on a plane
(X) Been lost – Typically in the back corner of Costco.
(X) Been on the opposite side of the country
(X) Gone to Washington , DC
(X) Swam in the ocean
(X) Cried yourself to sleep – Mainly because they stopped making my favorite lipstick. I HATE YOU RIMMEL!!
(X) Played cops and robber – Or cops and ‘borrowers’.
(X) Recently colored with crayons
( ) Sang Karaoke-at home
(X) Paid for a meal with coins only? – Hello, how else do you pay for Taco Bell?
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't?
(X) Made prank phone calls – Then they invented caller ID and ruined everything.
( ) Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose – Nothing comes out of my nose. I repeat, nothing.
(X) Caught a snowflake on your tongue
( ) Danced in the rain
(X) Written a letter to Santa Claus – Mom thought it best to deny his existence from day one.
(X) Been kissed under the mistletoe
( ) Watched the sunrise with someone you care about – That would require waking before the sun came up. No thanks.
(X) Blown bubbles
(X) Gone ice-skating
(X) Been skinny dipping outdoors - Does showering with the window cracked count? Because I want to be seen as somewhat daring.
(X) Gone to the movies

1. Any nickname? BJ, Beks, and other names I can’t share…
2 Mother's name? Mom
3. Favorite drink? ‘Mexican Soda’
4. Tattoo? Wait, is mom reading this? Because in that case… no.
5. Body Piercings: Several.
6. How much do you love your job? Is pops reading this? Because if so… love it.
7. Birthplace? So. Cal.
8. Favorite vacation spot? Napa.
9. Ever been to Africa ? I’ve seen it on TV so that counts.
10. Ever eaten cookies for dinner? Heck, I’ve had them for breakfast.
11. Ever been on TV? Yes. ‘Wildest Police Chases’
12. Ever steal any traffic sign?? Is the government reading this? If so… no.
13. Ever been in a car accident? Genius here rear-ended a Rolls Royce.
14. Drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle?? Yes?
15. Favorite salad dressing?? Ranch made with gobs of mayonnaise.
16. Favorite pie?? I’m not a real big pie fan.
17. Favorite number? People have favorite numbers?
18. Favorite movie? Rebecca by Alfred Hitchcock.
19. Favorite holiday? Respect for the Aged Day
20. Favorite dessert? Any/All – And none of the sugar/fat free crap either!
21. Favorite food? Anything with lard made by the loving hands at Hilberto’s.
23. Favorite brand of bodywash? Whichever one I have a coupon for.
24. Favorite toothpaste? See #23
25. Favorite smell? Clorox Bleach
26. Favorite place to relax? Everywhere
27. How do you see yourself in 10 years? Ravishingly good looking after my plastic surgery and botox injections.
29. Furthest place you will send this message? Malaysia


Btrony said...

absolutely hilarious!! i can't stop laughing!

Nicole said...

Good answers! I'm glad I could give you something to do today:)

Anonymous said...

It should be illegal for you to make me laugh this hard....AT WORK.

I could get busted man!

Great post!


Lizzie M. said...

Very funny!!!