Thursday, April 10, 2008

Dear Mr. Kiosk….

I went to the mall last night for a little retail therapy – not that I can afford it, but in reality, who can?

In the middle walkway of our mall, kiosks sell everything from cell phones to t-shirts. As I’m walking from store to store, inhaling the new clothing smell, a guy starts yelling at me, ‘Mam! Come try this lotion!’

‘No thanks’ I say with a smile and keep walking – yeah right, like I’m going to stop for a guy who calls me ‘Mam’.

‘Can I just ask you a question?’ He yelled – and the yelling wasn’t necessary since I was 8 feet away.

‘No thanks’ I say while continuing my stride.

‘It’s just ONE question!’ He yelled louder as people started to look – though I’m sure they were just thankful he wasn’t yelling at them.

Wanting so badly to yell back, ‘Look buddy, I’m not interested in you frickin’ lotiony crap. I don’t care about the anti-aging/anti-cellulite/anti-wrinkle/firming/magic garbage you’re selling! I have skinny arms and I can hide my fat butt under a skirt so I don’t need you! Would you just let a girl shop!?!?!’ but instead said a polite but simple, ‘No thanks.’

Come on, I should get a medal for my restraint.


‘JESUS!’ he screamed as he slammed down the lotion – and he wasn’t calling out the name to honor the Lord if you know what I mean.

I stopped dead in my tracks and started to turn toward him but decided against it.

I have an interview today and I’ve heard black eyes followed by stories that start with ‘look, it wasn’t my fault…’ aren’t exactly ‘job magnets’.

Lucky little lotion man.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I would have yelled back "NO MEANS NO!" or RAPE! or I SAID NO! to emabarrass him to NO end.

I talk big on here but I'm really a sissy at heart but that guy...ACK!!!

What he did was just so rude and not called for.

TheFitnessFreak said...

That guy would be the proud recipient of the title "unemployed" if he came across me! Maybe I'll go provoke him and see if it works:)

Lisa Gunn Magnus said...

I am impressed with that restraint. I would have pumeled the guy. We have those same guy's in our mall too, very rude if they think that sells they're wrong! We'll be praying for you on your interview. But hey who wouldn't hire you:).