To help you understand, I drew a picture like the one on TV. Please remember, I don’t make hundreds of thousands of dollars a year for a design company so my technical and drawing skills aren’t exactly the same as the people from NBC. But they are close...um... for stick people.
Sorry, I didn’t intend to make him look like a monkey.
I really feel as though we are all called to use our bodies to the best of our abilities. Soo… I did a drawing of my own body in an effort to discover my true calling.
As I’ve said before, my leg/arm to abdominal ratio closely resembles a Welsh Corgie…
But what I don’t often mention is my GI-NORMOUS ribcage. I could gain 300 pounds and still have protruding ribs.
Here’s what I came up with…
My legs and arms prevent me from being a real contender in running, swimming, or jumping so that leaves the following Olympic sports…
OK. What other things could my oddly shaped body be good at? Here’s what I came up with:
1 – Bearing children.
2 – Competitive eating
3 – Playing an anorexic or a zombie or an anorexic zombie a movie.
Chris vetoed child bearing.
I called my peeps at Warner Bros and they said my whole body would need to be thin... not just my ribs... to play an anorexic - plus they have plenty of real anorexics to choose from in Hollywood.
And they said they are using computer graphics for zombies these days – anorexic or otherwise.
I guess that only leaves one option….
I’m calling Hostess and Little Debbie to ask them if they’d be interested in supporting the next big thing in competitive eating.
Hilberto’s here I come!